Posts Tagged "Betsy Bonnema"
Leaping
I have some big news to report. As of November 1, I have sold my half of RedStar Creative to my business partner, Betsy Bonnema.
Phew. There. I’ve said it.
This has been a painstaking and agonizing decision for me, on so many levels. First, Betsy and I have been friends for over 25 years. We were roommates in college, maids-of-honor in each other’s wedding, and for the past 17 years, have been like second moms for each other’s children. This will never change.
The thing is though, I’ve been going through a “growth phase” for quite a while now. Several years ago, I bought a print by Brian Andreas called Angels of Mercy. Every day, I sit in my office and stare at this little drawing and I wonder, “What if…?”
"Angels of Mercy, by Brian Andreas"
Around the same time I bought that print, I read a book by Po Bronson called What Should I Do With My Life? It talked about people who had good, stable, well-paying careers who threw caution to the wind, quit their jobs, and bravely charted new paths, this time doing something they loved.
I admired those people so much for their honesty and their bravery, but for the life of me, I couldn’t figure out how I could possibly quit my career and start over. For one thing, I was already doing what I loved. I owned my own ad agency. When I was a senior in high school, I gave a speech at my graduation commencement. The principal introduced me by saying, “Joy plans to go the University of Minnesota next spring and pursue a degree in journalism. One day, she hopes to own her own advertising agency.”
And by God, that’s exactly what I did (though it didn’t happen exactly the way I intended). After college, I wanted to be an advertising copywriter with a Minneapolis ad agency. I wanted it more than anything, and I worked relentlessly lining up informational interviews with busy, unpleasant creative directors. Unfortunately, there were no jobs to be found. In the spring of 1991, when things were looking pretty bleak, my friend Betsy called and invited me to Spicer for the summer. She enticed me with some freelance copywriting gigs, and the opportunity to spend my lunch breaks waterskiing on Green Lake. Enough said… I was in.
Betsy and Joy, Green Lake, 1991
By June, Betsy and I realized we were a great creative team. She offered me an opportunity to buy into the company as a full partner, and I took it. For the next 20 years, we would run our business together, squeezing in marriages, babies, and “Life 101″ classes along the way.
At some point though, I realized I wanted more. I wanted to be able to use my gifts of reading and writing to somehow make a difference. But for me, the thought of quitting my job was preposterous and self-indulgent. Who was I to want more when I already had so much?
I made myself miserable trying to figure out how to move on to “the next big thing” while still clinging to my “one sure thing.” When Betsy and I decided to take a creative sabbatical earlier this year, I started dabbling with the idea of doing something different. I had always wondered what it would feel like to wake up each morning and be a WRITER… a real one, who wrote for a living.
It felt good. I wrote and I read; I blogged and I journaled. However, as I wrote, it became more and more apparent to me that this is what I was meant to do. At the same time, that realization was both sad and frightening. After all, everyone knows that writers are poor, sullen, and depressed. Quitting my job and becoming a writer didn’t seem like an upwardly-mobile move for me, or my family.
I was really struggling, trying to cling to my safety net, but knowing I had to make a leap of faith. Then, I remembered something my friend Jane had told me a year earlier. She said, “Leap, and the net will appear.”
Leap, and the net will appear.
So, that’s what I’ve decided to do. I’m leaping into the great unknown… a scary, exhilarating place that offers no promises or guarantees. I have no Plan B at this time, but will leap with faith and courage, and hope that the net appears.
A few months ago, I wrote this song at a time I was really struggling for answers. I dedicate it to all the other women out there who are facing this same battle.
Leap!
By Joy Baker
She sat there
Waiting, wondering
Feeling scared
And all alone.
She was begging for some answers
To this life she’d now outgrown
Is it over? Am I finished?
Is this how the plan will end?
Can you hear me?
Are you listening?
Don’t you know how hard it’s been?
But I AM here, came the answer.
In the wind. And in the trees.
In the smiling laughing, crying
In the falling of the leaves.
In the then, and in the now.
The beginning and the end.
I am here. Always here.
And I’ve just one word to send.
CHORUS
You must leap (leap!)
Leap for all you’ve ever been
You are strongest
After weakness
You are ready to begin.
So just leap (leap!)
I’ll be with you
Always near.
Trust me, know me
Travel with me
Take the leap (leap!)
And the net will appear.
Every new beginning
Is the end of something done.
When you think you’ve lost it all
There’s still a battle to be won
So come with me
Live in peace
Hold my hand
And then we’ll soar
Higher up, to see new places
Where you haven’t gone before.
CHORUS
You must leap (leap!)
Leap for all you’ve ever been
You are strongest
After weakness
You are ready to begin.
So just leap (leap!)
I’ll be with you
Always near.
Trust me, know me
Travel with me
Take the leap (leap!)
And the net will appear.
She stood slowly. Can I do it?
I don’t know. I’m happy here..
Am I really? Is it worth it?
Living every day in fear?
I’ve come through it
Bruised and broken.
I’ve been down
And almost out.
But I’m back
And I can make it.
Take my hand!
He heard her shout.
CHORUS
Let’s go leap (leap!)
Leap for all you’ve ever been
You are strongest
After weakness
You are ready to begin.
So just leap (leap!)
I’ll be with you
Always near.
Trust me, know me
Travel with me
Take the leap (leap!)
And the net will appear.
"She knew the answers would come with time and love."
My crazy, wonderful week
Of all the weeks of my life, I think this one will go down as the craziest and most wonderful one ever. Today, Sunday, I’m writing this post from sunny Longboat Key, Florida, where it will be 80 degrees later today. On Monday, I was shoveling 18 inches of new snow at home in Minnesota. And by 6am Tuesday morning, I was in a car with my best friend, Betsy, bound for Chicago and a spot in the Oprah Show audience. It’s hard to believe it’s only been seven days.
But, first things first.
Oprah.
I received this email message late in the day on Thursday, February 17…
From: OprahShowAudience
Subject: Audience Invitation to Attend “The Oprah Winfrey Show”! Please READ & RESPOND.
Date: February 17, 2011 3:23:21 PM CST
To: undisclosed-recipients
Hello!
You are receiving this message because you sent an email to oprah.com about being available on Wednesday February 23, 2010. I read your email and would like to invite you to attend the taping of this show to be in our audience!
…to which I replied:
“OMG!!! YES, YES, YES! Of course I can make it!”
Logically, I knew there was a snow storm coming. Logically, I knew I would be leaving for Florida with my family on Saturday morning. Logically, I knew my son had a huge presentation due for his geography class and needed my help. These things I knew.
But here’s what else I know. When you’ve been trying to get tickets to the Oprah Show for over ten years, you don’t question the logic. You just go.
Many of you followed our adventure on Facebook, but for those who didn’t, here’s what you missed:
Oprah Adventure – video update #1
On our way to the Windy City!
Feb 22, 2011 6:34am
***
Facebook status update
Just got on I-94 in St. Cloud… here we come Oprah!
February 22 at 7:37am
***
Oprah Adventure – video update #2
February 22 at 9:31am
Oprah Adventure – video update #3 (part 1)
February 22 at 1:15pm
(Betsy writing) After stopping in Eau Claire to eat, we got word that an old friend of Joy’s was in town getting his car fixed. It’s an Oprah-style surprise for Keith Oliver, father of Amy Oliver, a classmate of Joy’s from high school!
Oprah Adventure – video update #3 (part 2)
February 22 at 1:28pm
(Betsy writing) Joy finds Keith Oliver back in the service center waiting area. “Surprise! It’s Joy Almendinger!”
Oprah Adventure – video update #4
February 22 at 4:56pm
Say money, but it won’t get you too far
Oprah Adventure – video update #5
February 22 at 7:28pm
We finally made it! We’re checked into our hotel and having a little wine to celebrate our good fortune. Cheers!
Oprah Adventure – video update #6
February 22 at 11:02pm
We found a bit of deep fried crawfish and authentic blues at a joint just around the corner from our hotel. Would have stayed longer, but are abiding by the self imposed Oprah Show curfew!
Oprah Adventure – video update #7
February 23 at 5:28am
GOOD MORNING, OPRAH! TODAY IS THE DAY!!!!!!!
***
Facebook status update
In the cab… on our way!
February 23 at 6:31am via Mobile Web
***
Oprah Adventure – video update #8
February 23 at 6:45am
(Betsy writing) We arrive at Harpo Studio at about 6:45am. It’s a beautiful day and we are among the first in line! We are getting so excited it is hard to think. Once we wait in this hallway for a few minutes, we are escorted inside, they take our coats and hand us a blue disclaimer form. There is a lot of information in small print that totally overwhelms Joy. Soon we are escorted into a holding area where we sit patiently with 300+ women (and a few men) all dressed up and buzzing with excitement! Is this really happening?
***
There’s a big gap in time here, and that’s because we couldn’t have any cameras, phones, or even a piece of paper when we went into the studio. They took us through security and went through our purses, putting all non-admissable items in a Zip-loc baggie. They took our coats and gave us a blue piece of paper to look over and sign.
Here’s how my mind was working at this point:
What is it? This thing? Let’s see… it’s a blue piece of paper. Lots of words. So many words. My God, what does it say?? Think Joy. It’s a blue piece of paper. It has a line at the bottom. That means I’m supposed to read it and sign it. OMG… I can’t read this. I can’t think. I can’t process. Just give me the damn pen.
They ushered us into a holding room with rows of seats arranged back-to-back. At this point, we still had no idea what the show was about, nor what to expect.
Here was my thought process at this point:
Oprah. We’re going to see Oprah. I wonder how all these people got tickets. I wonder what the topic is. Let’s see. Do these people look like they have anything in common with me? Maybe it’s a show about blogging. Maybe it’s a show about Oprah’s biggest fans. Maybe Betsy had something to do with this (I eye her suspiciously). No, but that can’t be… I’m the one who got the tickets. I wonder why no one knows what the topic is?? OMG. Maybe we’re all getting on a bus and going somewhere. Maybe we’re her best, most ultimate viewers ever, and this will be something even bigger and better than the “Favorite Things” show or a trip to Australia. Oh, but it doesn’t matter what the topic is. Just being here is enough. Just getting to see Oprah is enough. But, I just wonder…
Betsy and I had been very careful to wear bright, colorful, non-patterened outfits in hopes of getting a front row spot. When they called our numbers (that were on the blue piece of paper… we had no idea), we were ushered into OPRAH’S STUDIO where we were asked to pick a spot in the back section. We ended up in the second to the last row… which was actually a great seat. Oprah’s studio is much smaller than it appears on TV, so we were actually very close to her, even in the back row.
As it turns out, the show was about Susan Lefevre, aka Marie Walsh, the fugitive mom. She was arrested in Detroit at age 19 for a drug-related charge. She was promised probation, so she plead guilty and ended up getting sentenced to 10-20 years in a medium security prison. She was so distraught, she ended up escaping, then went on the lam for 32 years and became a suburban wife and mother in California.
** NOTE, THIS EPISODE WILL AIR APRIL 7, 2011 **
It was an interesting topic, but truth be told, I could not follow a word that Susan Lefevre/Marie Walsh was saying. It may have been similar to the blue paper situation, or it could be that Susan/Marie was rambling a bit, but whatever the case, I think I will watch the show and say to myself, “Huh, I don’t remember her saying that.”
Oprah Adventure – video update #9
February 23 at 11:30am
(Betsy writing again) If I seem emotional and mushy in this clip, it is because I am. What an experience. Along with witnessing a great Oprah Show, we got to spend another 45 minutes or so just chatting it up with Oprah after the taping. She was all that we had hoped she would be…. so funny, so real, so kind and so gracious. She told stories, swore, answered questions and gave us the inside scoop on lots of fun topics. She also joked about her hairstyles and many fashion mishaps from the 80s. It was fabulous! Yes… I cried… WE cried… out of pure happiness. Sappy, I know. But hey… it was Oprah! And she rocks!
***
It was an amazing, crazy, inspirational journey that left me thinking… this was meant to be. Betsy and I… at Oprah… after all these years of trying… during Season 25, her last year… while we ourselves just so happen to be on sabbatical celebrating 20 years of business…
Yes, it was meant to be. I have so much more I’d love to share about Oprah, but my word count is already nearing 1400, and I really need to move on to my Villa Am Meer story this week, while I’m on Longboat Key.
So, THANK YOU OPRAH. Thanks for the memories. And don’t forget to check Betsy’s blog at betsybonnema.wordpress.com for more about our Oprah Adventure.
Here’s our final wrap-up video that we took in the car on our way home (note this was taken via web cam, so the image is reversed… Betsy’s the one driving). Thanks for following our journey, and check in to read more about Villa Am Meer this week!!
We interrupt this regular blogcast…
For those of you who have been following my Love Letters story, I apologize for this momentary lapse, but I have some important news to report. Huge news. Huge enough to preempt my regular blogcast.
You see, after many, many years of trying… my request has finally been accepted, and I AM GOING TO SEE OPRAH!!!
Yes, it’s absolutely true. This Wednesday, my best friend (and business partner) Betsy and I will be in the audience of the Oprah show. We have no idea what the topic is yet… nor do we care.
We. are. going. to. see. Oprah.
When I heard Season 25 would be Oprah’s last year, I decided to pull out all the stops in order to get tickets for her show. Over the years, I’ve tried phoning, emailing, snail-mailing… the works. However, Season 25 presented a new challenge. Anyone wishing to attend a taping of the Oprah show had to submit an online request and, in a nutshell, tell the Harpo staff why they were worthy of being in the audience for Oprah’s final season.
I tried them all.
I have told Oprah how much I love Shaun Cassidy, M.C. Hammer, and Diana Ross. I’ve written long dissertations about being a multiple (a twin that is, not personality), why the Sound of Music is my favorite movie of all time, and why I am absolutely one of her ultimate viewers.
Denied. Denied. Denied.
I have recorded every show. Read every Book Club book. Followed Jean Chatzky’s Debt Diet. Last week, I even bought her favorite Centerville Chicken Pie from Harry and David.
Anything for Oprah.
However, time was winding down. This was the last season, and alas, it seemed this would be one item on my bucket list I’d never be able to cross off.
When I saw an audience reservation topic titled, “Girlfriend Groups,” I thought AHA. This, I know. This will surely get me a spot on Oprah. Here’s what I wrote:
In 1991, when I was in my young 20s, I moved from Minneapolis to Spicer, a small town in west central Minnesota. At the time, there were more people in my high school graduating class than the entire town combined. I really had no intention of staying. I followed a college friend whose family had a lake cabin in Spicer. She’d recently started her own graphic design studio and invited me out to do some freelance copywriting and waterskiing. We had a great summer, business was steady, and I bought in as an equal partner in the company. Then winter came. I learned that Spicer is really a summer town, and not much of a winter one. The cabin people left, the lake froze over, and I was more homesick than ever. But then, the craziest thing happened. Betsy (my friend/business partner) convinced me to join a pool team. She said it would be a good way to pass the time over the winter. I reluctantly agreed, and the decision changed my life. We joined a team with Diane, a party girl and former skating car hop; LeeAnn, a lawyer, singer, and guitar player who drank Jack Daniels on the rocks; and Shelly, a daycare mom who could bank an 8 ball with 90% accuracy. Over the course of that pool league, we got married, divorced, had babies, changed careers, raised families, laughed and cried. Then, in the fall of 1998, LeeAnn’s two year old daughter, Emma, was diagnosed with brain cancer. Eight months later, Shelly’s 10 year old son, Cody, was killed when he was hit by a car. Five months after that, Emma died. We didn’t know how we could go on. But we did. We’ve helped each other through tragedy and triumph. We’ve learned to rely on each other as much as we rely on our own families. And to this day, we’re still as different from one another as any girlfriend group could possibly be. But love is the tie that binds. And love is what we do.
I had poured my heart out and hoped for the best. I waited for a reply which never came.
Denied.
At that point, I realized that if I couldn’t even get Oprah tickets by laying it all on the line and ripping off my emotional Band-Aids, well, then, I guess it just wasn’t meant to be.
Then, two weeks ago, I saw a notice on the audience reservations page that said “Last Minute Availability! February 22 and 23 shows!” I have absolutely no idea what I wrote. Nothing long, nothing moving, and certainly nothing that followed any journalistic standards (at least not that I can recall). But, I guess it did the trick. I got the following email last Thursday:
Hello!
You are receiving this message because you sent an email to oprah.com about being available on Wednesday February 23, 2010. I read your email and would like to invite you to attend the taping of this show to be in our audience!
I leapt off the couch and started screaming something about Oprah while my husband and teenage sons looked on in (shock? bewilderment? horror?). When I stopped shaking and could finally speak coherently, I read the entire email to them. It wasn’t a joke. I was going to see Oprah.
Bucket list, be damned.
So, join me this week as Betsy and I head out on our big “Oprah Adventure.” We’re heading out at 6am tomorrow morning, braving two feet of new snow, and hell-bound for the Windy Cindy. We’ll be blogging and podcasting along the way, so stay tuned.
OMG. I’m going to see Oprah.
Read MoreSabbatical!
So sorry for the long lapse in my posts lately! Things got a little crazy around the New Year. We happened to be in Fargo for a wrestling tournament during that huge blizzard that caused a 100 car pile-up on I-94 heading west. When that happened, we were heading OUT of town on I-94 heading east. Sheesh… it was bad. Very thankful we made it home safe and sound. As it turned out, the rest of the team (including all coaches and parents) got stuck in Fargo for another two days because they closed the freeway.
So, why were we in such a rush to get home, risking life and limb? Well! As I mentioned in my last post, we had a date with a crown roast for New Year’s Eve, and we were determined to get home and get our party on! We had four couples over for the big shin-dig, and we had a blast. Here are a few pictures:
The roast was absolutely delicious! If you can believe it, Ross made the little paper hats for the top. I was running behind, so I asked him if he’d take the directions I’d found on Martha Stewart’s web site and go make them for me. He scoffed a bit, made himself a rum and coke, then disappeared into my office for a long while. When I finally went to check on him, here’s the sight I saw (I’m still laughing):
So, that was our New Year’s Eve. The next day, January 1, we celebrated our annual New Year’s Day tradition with Ross’s family – New Year’s Pancakes for about 100 people. Ross’s Grandma Martha turned 97 this year on December 27, and she’s held this tradition in her family ever since she was a child. The recipe is German… homemade buttermilk pancakes with diced apples and anise seed. So yummy! Email me if you want a copy of the recipe.
The next day, January 2, we took the kids to St. Cloud to go “gift card shopping.” They each bought a new snowmobile jacket, and I bought myself a new Nook from Barnes & Noble (love it!). Not sure what Ross bought. Maybe some new socks… he loves SmartWool.
Then… on January 3… I officially started my two month SABBATICAL. My best friend and business partner, Betsy Bonnema, and I are celebrating our 20th year in business this year. (We started a small ad agency together just out of college – RedStar Creative.) Rather than the family cruise we had always talked about, we decided to give ourselves two months off (two months!) to not work and, instead, concentrate on our creative endeavors. Betsy is a very talented artist and spends a lot of time repurposing old furniture into beautiful and meaningful works of art. She’s also a talented writer and keeps a blog at betsybonnema.wordpress.com. Check out some of her amazing art, and don’t miss her Christmas post… it’s really special.
As for me… well… I haven’t actually had time to start my sabbatical yet. I’m busy trying to get a new web site launched for one of our clients, so I’ve been working on that for the past few weeks. Once that’s done, however, I’m hoping to do a lot more writing, including finishing-up some writing projects I’ve started over the years. Mostly though, I’m looking forward to just “being still” and catching up with this rolling snowball that’s become my life. I look forward to discovering new possibilities that might come my way if I just sit still long enough to pay attention.
And of course, I haven’t forgotten about my Love Letters! Rest assured, I’ll be back in the next day or two with Chapter 6 of my Love Letters story. Stay tuned…
In the meantime… back to work…
Read MoreAbout Me
Join me in my sporadic ramblings as I embrace the curious life. Wife of a turkey farmer. Mother of two teenage boys. Avid ponderer. Treasure seeker. Curator of the written word. I enjoy sparking interest in the mundane and uncovering a compelling backstory.
